Teaching Fear will make better kids

After just fielding the 190th telephone call from my mom complaining about my unruly , disrespectful, unsympathetic, and undisciplined siblings, I am convinced now that there is one particular value that a parent MUST instill in a child during toddler, child and teenage-hood.

FEAR!

Why I say this?

Each time I have one of these marathon complaint sessions with my parents, the phone conversation turns to me placing the blame back on them for several reasons:

(1) they decided to have their children over the span of 30 years. They spaced us out 5-6 years and thus as they near retirement age, they don't have the same strength and tenacity to lay down the gauntlet when necessary & keep them in line as they did with my 28 year old sister and me. Though I admit, having children is a joyous experience and blessing and nothing pleases me more than watching my boys grow up. However, I dare say that 30 years is entirely too long a span in my book to be dealing with the myriad of stresses and emotions that come with raising kids;

(2) they give to these last two with no expectation of them having to repay or earn whatever privilege has been bestowed on them and so those two have little to no work ethic whatsoever; and

(3) they do not ever punish those last two for wrongdoing so they have learned that there are really no repercussions for their bad acts and they continue to do naughty things.

Put all the psychobabble jaburwurcky aside, kids do need to be raised with a certain level of FEAR! A child needs to

fear his parents and repercussions from his/her action if s/he does the wrong thing...

fear of dangerous activities (touching a hot stove, riding his bike in a busy highway, experimenting with drugs) so s/he can live a long life and not place him/herself in the path of unnecessary doom...

fear God or a higher being. Ethics, Morals, Sympathy towards mankind, Self-esteem and self-worth are molded on a fear of an afterlife or being connected to the universe and other living things through some means. Kids will think twice about bullying others, engaging in illegal activies, being promiscuous etc.

I am a softee in the family and I admire Dave for standing firm and sticking to his guns when it comes to keeping the boys in line. I really am trying but need to do a better job of pulling up the slack otherwise, I will be forced to repeat history through my parents.